January 1st ,1991. Quite a busy day today for all of us at home. We had guests come around. I didn’t enjoy the noise all over the house but I did though as it took mum off my case. She was busy attending to them. Mum cooks well ,you know and so there was a lot to eat and enjoy from. Diary,I do hope this year gets better than last year. That shouting aunt is still around. She has decided to help me wash my clothes too. I like her for that ,you know I don’t like washing. She is so nice.
2nd ,1991 Dad took us out. The amusement park was so much fun. Candy floss and popcorn was such great stuff. Diary,that aunt bought me sweets at the park too. Her name is aunt Jane. Mum said she is her mother younger brother’s daughter that that uncle is her husband. Could that explain why they sleep on each other at night and make noise? Maybe? Does my dad and mum do that too? Are grown -ups mad people?
3rd ,1991. Today is dad’s birthday and when I asked how old he was,mum said that was rude to ask! Tell me diary,was it rude to ask my dad his age? Paul and Bridget know their dad’s and mum’s age,so why not me? I am so sad. I don’t like my mummy.Maybe she doesn’t like me too.School resumes on Monday but mum says I wont go until the next one. She said we were all going to dad’s village that week. I really don’t want to go to that place,there are a lot of mosquitoes and there is no light too. And there is a bad uncle there too . Remember that one that made mum beat me that time we were there. Just because I ate the food he gave me in his room.
Diary,I wont take you with me this time because mum said we will be putting our things together in one big box. I don’t want her to find you there.
When we return,I will let you know how it went. Ok?
Good night.
12th January ,1991. God! Diary, I missed you so much. The village was so boring. Many old people this time than ever and they were all fussing at me. I don’t like them because they made me wonder if people were that nice. People aren’t nice, right? Only you, diary is nice and Paul and Bridget too. That uncle was there again and this time ,he took me out on a stroll when mummy went to the market with some other people. He took me to another friend’s place –and we saw a movie . People were not wearing clothes and doing some of those things that aunt Jane and her husband did in my room. They even screamed like that too. They were so many in that film and I didn’t like it but the uncles seem to like it. As the two of them came closer to me and touched me in my bom bom. I cried and asked my uncle to take me back home. It was painful the way they touched me. Diary, it was in my bom bom place where I wee-wee. I will tell mum.
15th January,1991. I came back from school today. We didn’t talk yesterday,diary. I don’t think I will tell mum again . She will beat me. I will tell Paul and Bridget today at school. That is the driver shouting my name already. See you later today or tomorrow ,my lesson teacher will come today and tomorrow.
18th January,1991 Guess what Bridget told me? I cant believe it. She said she and Paul use to sleep on each other too. I asked her if they made noise when they did and she said yes! Diary,I thought it was only grown-ups. She said they have been doing that since they were eight and ten. Now they are nine and 11 years . Paul repeated the class because he was not serious with school work. Bridget said that their mum an dad had a lot of those kind of movies that I saw in the village. She said they were good for us too. Is it true? Maybe then,because Paul and Bridget are nice to me so I believe them.
When will I get a chance to see the movies in their house? Do you know,diary.
25th January,1991. My bombom still hurts from that village touch. When mum asked me why I walked that way, I told her that I fell in the gutter.I am happy she didn’t beat me this time. She only told me to be careful next time. I almost told her what really happened but I am so afraid.
1st February,1991. I have been sick with malaria ,diary. So sick that mum thought I would die. How can mum that always beat me love me? Hmmm. Dad traveled that whole week and though I feel better now ,I still cant write for long yet.
I am tired . I have been having nightmares since that time. Diary, what do I do? I put you on the table today and went to the kitchen to keep my plates ,and saw him reading it. He wants me to tell him about the movie I saw in the village and all the other things I told you. Today is 8th February
Today,diary I start to share you with my brother. He is eight years old and in primary 4. He promised not to tell mum.
The weekend was so boring,diary. Ok,lemme give you a name today. Do you like Darlyn? Good,I like it too.
Darlyn,I am in primary 6 as you already know and would soon be going on to the secondary school. New school again,right? Exciting!I will be joining some of my classmates for some fund raising for our school library on Monday. I am looking forward to it. Today is Sunday 10th ,1991.
Good night,Darlyn.
Monday,11th What is wrong with aunt Jane? She was shouting to herself at night and she didn't let me sleep well! When are they going to leave our house?! At the fund raising today,we went out to the streets around my school with a form asking people to give any amount. Paul and Bridget were with me in my group and we met many funny looking men who said they liked what we were doing and gave us their house addresses. Bridget seems to know some of them and they even put her on their laps and gave her extra money than the one she put in the form. Bridget buys alot of sweets from the money and she is so nice that she gives me some too. She gives Paul too.
Darlyn,she said some of the men wants to be giving me money too. I think I like that. 15th February,1991.
16thThe fund raising ended today and we are getting ready for our graduation in some few weeks. I wonder what I would be doing at home all that time before I get another school.
18th February Darlyn,secondary would be more fun,right? My brother will come to join me soon too. Bridget and Paul are going to a boarding school. I will miss them yet again but I can meet new friends in the school . I keep making new ones in short periods.
22nd February I haven't seen those films since that time in the village. Those people in those films act like dogs,u know,Darlyn. I don't like it one bit. I really wish I could get you or anyone to explain to me.
10th March,1991. My throat hurts and my head and back aches too ,Darlyn. Mum gave me some sweets. She said I will be better soon.
Darlyn,where have you been all the while? I hid you so far away because of the chicken pox I had. The doctor said it is contagious ,so I had to keep you. I missed my exams to the secondary school because of that and mum said I am a witch. Do witches have chicken pox? If I was one,I would have left this house a long time! I am well now though the spots still appear on my body.They said it will go soon. maybe? I don't care anymore. Today is April 11th ,1991
I got to school . Anther school this time,Darlyn and not the other one. I missed the exam of that one,so mum put me in her friend's secondary school. So,the proprietor is my guardian here and she is always asking me many questions about me.I try to tell her some and not all because she might tell mum.
Easter break. Break from you? No way,Darlyn. I like you. The break was short and there was nothing to it. Had a lot to eat and drink. Aunt Jane's husband came again and this time ,he slept in the living room. I am glad. 14th April
Aunt Jane's husband went away today. Aunt Jane will be here till October. Dad said she has to get some things done. 21st April.
Our integrated science teacher taught us something interesting today. He called it menstruation. He said it happens to us girls only and that blood was going to come out of our bom bom. That doesn't sound like fun! It will hurt,Daryln. I don't want it to happen to me. He talked about the boys too and all that will happen. Funny how the guys wont have that too! Darlyn!!! He said their voices will break in Pub... can't spell that well. I will get it for you later. He talked about wet dreams too. May 8th ,1991
I am learning more about girls and boys,you know. When will our integrated science teacher tell us about the shouting and all that I saw in movies. Yeah, he called it Puberty. He said we on our way to being adults. I am just 11!
Mum thinks am still a child. Though when I do anything wrong ,she thinks am grown.
Excursion begins! We would be going to Ghana! Darlyn,I will miss you. It is going to be 3 weeks away from home. I like it.
By the way, I made friends already on my new school. Alot of them are older and have grown breasts and have their voices cracking already. Where are my own breasts? Didn't Mr. Clark say we should all have it? Some people already think I am flat. It is not fair.
June 5th ,1991 We got some days ago. The excursion? Some of the people in my class are bad people,Darlyn. They were touching themselves in many places I don't like. Didn't the girls know that Mr Clark said they might get pregnant that way? I wont let any boy come near me. NO WAY!
The teachers didn't even know and few of them that did,touched the girls too. Mr Clark came to the excursion too and he was touching some boys. There is so much madness everywhere and am tired. Darlyn, what do I do?
Am crying,Darlyn. Aunt Jane was touching me too much this night. She said my breasts were coming out more and that she wanted to see it . I was shy at first but she started to touch them . Then she went on to my bombom . That hurt somehow and reason for my crying now. Why does everyone like to touch me there? She said I should not tell mum and that if I did,she wont even believe me.July 25th
Darlyn, every night since that first one ,aunt Jane has been touching me...
August 3rd, 1991. She said I wont be pregnant doing this with her.
August 20th. Today she made me touch her too. Her breast are bigger than mine. She is grown,I guess. I don't think it is right. But she said I am a good girl and she helps with my clothes.
I look forward to each night since then.September 14th
Mum almost caught us today. Aunt Jane and I! September 28th
Aunt Jane would be going away soon. Greg and Karen are doing funny things in the toilet. They are my friends in secondary. I got 70% in my English test today. I like my English Language teacher. My Christian Religious Studies teacher talked about heaven today. She said it was a place for good people who are God's children. I know too well ,Darlyn that I wont be going there ,I have been bad but I really want to be good. U know how,Darlyn?
My birthday this year was so funny. Aunt Jane bought me a funny gift. Some long looking object that she called a vibrator. And she doesn't want mum to see it too. Sure,she wont,I wold her. She said it will help me for those times that she was away. Darlyn,I am 11 years old today. Aunt Jane taught how to use it. It felt good.It was painful though. Very. September 17th,1991.
Aunt Jane went away on the 5th of October,1991 She taught me alot of things. I have started to teach Pamela and some other girls too.
11th October. Aunt Jane said it is a girl thing and that the boys were bad people who only gave girls babies. I told them that too. They in turn told many other girls and we became more in the school.
I passed my exams well and dad bought me alot of things too. My brother- David is going to join me soon in secondary! Darlyn,am growing big ,you know. JSS 2 soon! Wow!
Today,something very unusual happened to me. Blood is coming out of my bombom. I didn't know what to do . I ran to Mr Clark in his office and told him. HE was happy for me and said I was a big girl now. He gave me what he called sanitary towel to put it into my pants. I did. It didn't fill ok. He told me to tell mum . He said I have started my menstrual cycle already. That thing I didn't want eventually happened. I want my breast too then. I guess they would come soon. November 7th,1991
Mum bought me more sanitary towels and called me to her room and told me many things about boys. She said I shouldn't let them touch me now because I would get pregnant. She was telling me what I already knew. Aunt Jane's method was really safe then. Mum said I should not go near them for anything. So,I all the more stopped talking and playing with the boys. I wont want them to touch me at all.
Dad got back home late today and mum told her about my menstruation. He was glad and hugged me for so long. I like my dad.
Another one came this month too. I have many sanitary towels to use for it.
Holidays are here again and I will be missing all my friends and play mates. We would be going to the village. That uncle must not come any close this time. I don't want to be pregnant.We went to at Christmas. Darlyn, he had traveled somewhere else this time,so I didn't see him.
29th December,1991 Mum saw the gift aunt Jane gave me and beat me so hard. I told her that it was aunt Jane that gave me but she didn't believe me. She called me many name. Even dad didn't believe me. Aunt Jane used to lead prayers in her church and prayed hard in the morning. So,no one believes me. Darlyn,I know you do and am glad. David believes me too. Two of you at least.
My new year is bad,Darlyn. The gift has been seized and I already feel like it again. The girls are in their houses because school is on holidays.
Happy new year Darlyn,thanks for been there all through the year.
N.B:Please understand that I had to 'modify' her diary while not trying to take away the originality of her stuff. The innocence of this girl child is heartrending!
You also don't want to know how that something in me is sinking in great depression right now. But trust me, I will be fine! :-)
The names mentioned here are fictitious and does not bear resemblance with any persons or group of persons living or dead.
Come Monday for diary 3.
Awemoreborelanlay
Day 3
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